There is a fundamental difference between men and women when it comes to interacting. When communicating, women use a combination of code phrases, verbal inflection, body language, and meaning tempered by situational circumstances. Men use something called the DIRECT APPROACH when sharing words to convey thoughts.
Here is a good example. You come downstairs after spending some time getting ready to go to a party. In example #1, a female makes a comment. In example #2, a male makes a comment.
Example #1: Are you wearing that? (meaning – please change your clothes because I don’t want to be embarrassed when other women check you out and then see I am with you.)
Example #2: Dude, you look like a dork. Let’s go. (meaning – you look like a dork. Now get in the car.)
Which, of course, leads us to more differences which rear their head in a social gatherings. Let’s say a roomful of men and women see a new couple enter the room. The men, as a whole, will check out the woman. The women in the room will check out the woman.
Girls will notice what the guy is wearing, what the girl he came with is wearing, and whether or not each outfit matches and is accessorized well. The guys don’t care what other guys are wearing. Guys will notice what a girl is wearing, but not in a “wow, where did you get that blouse? It’s fabulous!” way. The only extent guys will think about clothing is what the girls clothing would look like crumpled at her feet.
So, in closing, think carefully before responding to the Are you going to wear that? line.
Take your pick of the responses below:
-”My clothing is on my body, so the answer is yes.”
-”Would you like to dress me to be absolutely sure?”
-(point to her outfit and say) “Well, I certainly can’t wear THAT!”
-”It was either this or the other thing at the bottom of my dirty clothes hamper.”
-”Is this a multiple choice quiz?”
-”What do I get if I guess right?”
4 responses so far ↓
sulz // November 22, 2006 at 9:53 am |
actually all those responses might sound kind of defiant to a sensitive girlfriend. what she really wants to hear is what’s wrong with this? so she can spew forth her trinny & susannah-ish knowledge on fashion don’ts.
*trinny & susannah – hosts of bbc2’s what not to wear. even if you don’t know the show you can guess what it is just from the title.
stjarna67 // November 22, 2006 at 8:17 pm |
I know better, I just want to get some guys in trouble. =)
Let them learn the hard way.
naturalhigh // November 23, 2006 at 2:13 pm |
Had to laugh. I know I’ve said those exact words before: “Are you going to wear that?” I am hoping for some response like, “Oh, no, this is just what I picked out to wear downstairs to find some gum. After I find it, I’m going upstairs to change into something manufactured in the last decade.”
headbang8 // November 27, 2006 at 10:35 pm |
As you’ve determined, this question is about her, not about you. She’s feeling insecure, and it’s YOUR fault.
The correct answer to this question (along with other seemingly innocent questions from “Do I look fat in this?” to “Shall we renovate the kitchen?”) is “I love you.”