The Government’s TO DO LIST (revealed in a recent secret memo)

___ Get Cindy Sheehan a big cup of coffee and some counseling. Tell the Crawford neighbor to put his gun away. Send everyone who collected at the Bush ranch home, telling them they made their point and that they have worn out their welcome.

___ Keep Howard Dean in the spotlight as much as possible. He will raise the bar for saying and doing stupid things so high that even the GOP couldn’t blow the next election. He will do as much damage to the Democrats as offering 10 non-choices for President.

___ Up Pat Robertson’s meds and give him another topic to focus on….maybe Terri Meuuwson in a bikini.

___ Send Chavez a nice fruit basket along with a nice little note saying to stay out of it. If he decides to have a problem with it, tell him that his next delivery will have a lot less fruit and a lot more explosives in it.

___ Enlist the help of Michael Moore, Sean Penn, Susan Sarandon, Tim Robbins, Jane Fonda, and any other pseudo-celeb who “want to make a difference” and provide them with weapons, rations, and airdrop them into Iraq to “straighten this whole mess out” for us. If they can survive, we will let them write memoirs and film movies about their experience when they get back home.


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