This Day In History (if People Magazine was in charge of the research)

It was exactly 34 years ago that a young Jennifer Aniston poopied in the potty. For her efforts, she was given a fine selection of sticker, several dozen roses, a tickertape parade, a key to the city, $250,000 dollars in cash, a tour of the White House, and a brand new watch. The government decided to make the day a federal holiday, so post offices and banks everywhere could celebrate the event with their families.

It was exactly 27 years ago that Jennifer Aniston suffered a papercut in school. She was rushed to the school nurse, who promptly applied a band-aid and an ice pack. Not sure if she could make it though the rest of the day, she had her mother pick her up from school.

It was exactly 15 years ago that Jennifer Aniston decided to spend the day in her house. Since she didn’t walk by the windows or anything, we aren’t really sure if she read a book or just watched some television.

It was exactly 8 years ago that Jennifer Aniston drove through a McDonald’s restaurant drive-thru. She ordered a Happy Meal, but instead of the french fries; she asked if she could substitute it for acting lessons. The supervising manager ended up getting involved, explaining the corporate rules against such practices… even for someone so desperately in need of acting lessons as her.

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