“Shove me in shallow water before I get too deep”

(please note: the Edie Brickell & The New Bohemian reference)

  Inspired by a few conversations I have had recently with co-workers, my already tired mind can’t seem to stop thinking of life choices that we each make. I really don’t want to be deep, but my mind won’t shut up. Maybe if I blog about it, I can do some double duty here. Get it out of my mind while, at the same time, bore the living (excrement) out of my blog visitors, too.

    Boiling down the first conversation, it comes down to a coworker who has worked where I am now for well over a decade. She was venting about how little she is paid there. Recently, it came to light that my employer posted a job opening for a similar position….but at a way higher wage. I know that she lives nearby, but told her that I have seen job positions in the paper which probably pay much higher but are a little farther from her house. Her reason for staying: living close to her current job is convenient. Hmmmmm. Live nearby to a job she obviously hates and let it drain the life from you OR work about 20 miles away, get paid more, and perhaps have it better.  It comes down to life choices.

The other conversation talked of comfort zones and that one must sometimes reach beyond what is “convenient” and risk something to perhaps improve things. You either choose your current standard or work toward a new one. A simple choice that not everyone is willing to make. 

I have struggled with having empathy for the first person, but then soon realized that I have little energy left to deal with the current pile of stresses I have now. My job has taken a sudden and unexpected change in directions recently, and my wife’s job has been even more intense. The details will have to wait as magick is currently afoot, and change is in the works. However, being somewhat cautious; I don’t want to reveal anything to the public just yet.

   I have discovered that managing your energy is just as important as being able to make decisions. I can have empathy, but ultimately make sure I take care of myself and my family……and a very large pile of dirty laundry, sitting in front of the washer. I pile that is bigger than you you can possibly imagine.

Here’s what I have learned:

1) Insomnia sucks. Being too tired to sleep sucks. Being too tired to daydream sucks.

2) Change can be scary and exciting at the same time. I figure that if I had avoided every opportunity where I felt these things; I would be an unemployed, broccoli-eating nervous house-bound wreck.

3) Having empathy is like having running water in the  house. It’s great to have for everyday living, but leave that faucets running and you’ll pay for it.

 4) I absolutely love cheese.


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