Top 10 things said by an incompetent phone actress

Inspired by a conversation about phone actresses at the Brass Tap, I bring you yet another Blather-Rinse-Repeat exclusive Top 10 List.

10) “That’s just sick.”

9) “Please tell me you’re in therapy.”

8 ) “What am I wearing? I don’t know. Pants. A shirt. Shoes.”

7) “Oh, yeah. I am hot. Really. Anonymous strangers telling me that they are turned on by women dressed in private school uniforms. I’m burnin’ up.”

6) “I’ve got a bad case of stomach cramps, so even if I just set the phone down; just keep talking.”

5) “Sorry, Reverend. We charge everyone full price.”

4) “Did I really need to know THAT?!?!?”

3) “No, I don’t have a webcam. Who wants to see a grown woman eat a bowl of ice cream? Are you THAT kinky?”

2) “You think THAT’S embarrassing. Try doing this for a living so much that the one time your Grandmother calls, you tell her you have to charge $2.99 a minute to talk to you.”

1) “What’s this about wanting me to pretend I’m Kari Byron and tell you I’m wearing nothing but silver body paint?!?!

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