America falls behind China in Food Scare Technology!

    With China using mercury, antifreeze and other harmful chemicals in manufacturing everything from pet foods to toothpaste, America falls behind in threatening the public safety. China only adds to their domination of injuring and killing off the population with the use of lead paint in the manufacturing of childrens’ toys.

       “Americans have got to pull ahead of the game. Otherwise, we’re gonna fall behind,” George W. Bush quipped while riding in a 10 Extra-large SUV caravan to some $1,000 a plate dinner event to increase environmental awareness of the ecosystem.

     “We got to cut funding to this thing called the FDA, so we can get down to some serious pollutin’ of our food supply,” Bush added.

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6 responses to “America falls behind China in Food Scare Technology!

  1. That which doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

    I, for one, drank from the hose, gnawed on old paint and was exposed to asbestos on a regular basis. But I’m still quite alive and am probably in much better health than all of the over-protected children out there today 🙂

  2. I remember picking at the asbestos insulated pipes while standing in my elementary school cafeteria line. It would make cool puffs of smoke when you hit it the right way.
    I also drank from garden hoses, rode in cars without car seats and booster seats. We lived life on the edge and didn’t even know it.

  3. Today we just process the hell out of kids foods ( mostly carbs) and put it in really cool wrappers.
    Show it on TV with cartoon characters selling designer sugar to our kids in between these dark freaky cartoons.
    Give them a cell phone to fry their brains one way or another.
    Take them to a jackass movie. {I jumped off the roof when I was 6, thought I was superman}
    Let them be contestants on you tube.
    Listen to music that okays shooting and raping.
    Dress them up like pimps and ho’s
    And give them a big ole PC dictionary( color co-ordinated of course) with translation in five other languages. And teach them sex ed in kindergarten.

    A rusty tonka toy and a green army man is the least of our problems.

  4. I loved those rusty tonka trucks. I wept a little when they turned them into wussy plastic toys. It was never the same after that. I had a whole collection of tonka toys and somehow managed to avoid ever getting lockjaw or tetnus… Sure, I may have gotten a cut or two off some jagged rusted off corner… But so what. I just better prepared me for life aboard a 40 year old aircraft carrier 🙂

  5. We could bring back nuclear testing in California. That would speed things up.

  6. If they don’t do something about Yucca Mountain soon, they may automatically initiate nuclear testing in California.

    I don’t think there will be many problems left in California once the fission kicks in.

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